Orange Soda

Well, I always have internal conflict, but I'm not really gonna talk about it to my classmates...so I'll just make something up...(aka, its probably gonna be really dumb)

So I've been having so problems lately. You can take it however you want to, I just ask that you don't look down on me but, I think I might be a dinosaur. I mean, People say they're extinct and that they haven't roamed the earth for thousands of years, But every time I wake up in the morning and look in the mirror, I can't help but think there's a brontosaurus starring back at me. the signs are everywhere. For example, I'll be walking around Walmart and see a copy of Jurassic Park and I can't help but feel attached to those man eating T-Rexes. I mean people tell me it's just a phase and that there's no way I could be a Dinosaur, But how can they say that when I'm driving around and suddenly want to go jump a 1st grader and eat his flesh. And I've been wondering, if I really was a dinosaur, what would I do? Would i be able to get a job? and support a half human half dinosaur family? I mean I'm sure State Farm has a ton of employees who are ancient reptiles, I could probably work there. But for now, I just don't know.

Ideal Mate?

Jessica Alba

Noah...Rated R

First off my movie with begin with a couple explosions and such, guns with be a must and probably the predator would have to make an appearance. I of course would be played by Samuel L Jackson, because throughout my life I have constantly looked and was just like him. From child birth till my death he would not need to change his appearance because I have always resembled a full grow adult Samuel Jackson. For my father I would have cast Rodney Dangerfield. Why you ask? because that would just be crazy awesome and who wouldn't want Rodney Dangerfield for a father? Now in my movie I would have an older self doing a monologue and if anyone could play an older wiser guy that can pull off the greatest monologue ever, it would have to be Morgan Freeman. Also because Morgan Freeman is made of pure magic. Last for eventual, wife it would have to be Jessica Alba...because I really am going to marry Jessica Alba...Simply because, She is hot. And as we all know this will be main not only into a movie, but a trilogy which will win pretty much every film award known to man.

I am Legend..ish

Now if I could change anything that I have done in the past it would be to choose the Soup over the Salad at TGI Fridays a few years back. I think we all know what would happen if I had made that critical decision. Well applying the concept of the Butterfly Effect, by choosing the chicken and rice soup I would have caused a chain reacting which lead to the eventual cure to cancer. But unknown tot he world the the newly found cure to cause, which is a virus, actually turns everyone into crazy grey zombie dudes, that chase you through the streets of New York, but since I ate that special bowl of TGI Friday's soup I became immune to the symptoms of becoming some weird as hell grey dude that runs really fast and like burns in the sun. So I decide to spend my life dicking around in my basement with my pet dog. Luckily I somehow find a completely clean '08 Cobra Mustang and drive around town shooting deer. Unfortunately I go out at night and start running over the creepy grey dudes and they flip my car. I end up waking up at home with some chick and her freaking son who just decide to barge into my house and eat my bacon. I mean come on if theres a crap ton of pissed off grey dudes with long jaws flippin over cars, and you bring your son long, real smart lady. If I were that kid, Id be like, "screw that I'm goin to Vermont". Turns outs I was just stuck in harlem for the past 3 years. So I went home, and that's why you should always choose the salad over the soup at TGI Fridays.